Skin Allergy: Eczema

It's been years.. Almost 10 years from now...ever since I was "contaminated" by skin allergy which docs called it Eczema.

I never had allergies before, always had prawns, crabs.. But nothing wrong. Until that day came..

When I was 18 (form 6), our class had a research trip to Kukup. Everything seems so fine and well, we even had a seafood feast before we return back.

But my nightmare seems to start there..
Few days after the trip, something like rashes started to appear at my elbow, and it's so itchy~!!! I though it was worm bite or normal rashes caused by dust mite or so, therefore did not seek for doctor's advise but only applied cream lotion.

But after a week, it doesn't seems to get well but even worse. It started to spread to other spots, especially the joints. I got so worried and ask my mummy to go to doctor with me.

We went to see Dr. Seah, a skin specialist whom I always called him Dr. Owl. Hehe.. Why? Coz he has tons and tons of owls collections in his clinic. >_<"

After examination, Doc told me that I was infected with eczema..

"Why doctor? I never had any allergy before, why now?"

[Do you have asthma?]

"Enn.. I do, but did not relapse for long."

[Eczema appears commonly on people whom has asthma. Imagine that the seed of virus is inside your body, but it wasn't triggered until now, therefore you are fine before. Something must have had triggered it. Anything special you ate recently?]

"Erm... I went for a research trip to Kukup a week ago, and had seafood..."

[It should be the seafood you had. It might be one of the seafood you ate contains bacteria that triggered your Eczema.]

"Har......~~~ then what can I do to cure it?"

(Doc then said something that hit me real hard..)

[I'm sorry girl... there is no cure for Eczema, you can only control it but no cure... Eczema is affected by few causes such as weather change, stress and of course food. You have to try on the foods and see which worsen your allergy and eliminate it. Most probably it will be seafood with shell. ]

My face definitely look like I'm doom that time.. My tears were just at the ledge, ready to fall.
No cure? seriously? Means I have to stick with all the itchiness, irritations for good?
No more butter prawns? no more black pepper crab for the rest of my life?

It was a straight hit to the head, a harsh one!
I became kinda gloomy after that... and really... no confidence at all...
because, i really look bad...rashes all over my hands, my patches and scars all over..
I wore long sleeves and long pants all the time no matter how hot it is...
I just don't wanna show people my ugly skin... I was a happy-go-lucky 18 years old girl but ends up being a gloomy, sad, ugly skin duckling. 

I had my hard times. It was really hard. It took me quite a long time to walk out of the shadow fearing that people will stare at me because of my ugly skin. That kind of staring doesn't feels good. It's like you have some fatal disease and they are scare to be infected.
THAT'S SO MEAN~!!!! its only a skin allergy!
I cried over and over and over for don't know how many time until one day I got bored, and I decided to let it go. Life is already hard, why make it harder because of other people? So, I stop covering my skin with long sleeves and pants and ya... I got stared all the time! but I told myself, let them be! Stare as much you want! I do no wrong, why scare of you staring~!

After releasing myself from the fear, I felt much better. I slowly regain my tiny confident and cheers like a growing sprout.. slowly being the same old Audrey I used to be... but stronger.

Life, there is always up and downs...
bright and darks...
happy and sorrows...
People often get stuck with tones of reasons...
but always remember,
Life, is only once.
So, stop living in the eye of others..
but Stay true to yourself~

p.s: I still have my scars all over, but as in now, I really don't mind and I don't bother if you stares at me, because I know, the one I love doesn't care and the one who loves me doesn't bother. Cheers~!

Precious Readers